One, let’s say [Carla], has some sort of problem with “initiating”, calling or texting me to ask to hang out. Almost every time we have gotten together, I’d invite her to dinner or ask if she could have company. I met her at B.M.Community College, during which time we met in Poetry class and got acquainted. Then I started working for the school newspaper and stopped seeing her around. I called Carla once, years later, asking to see if she’d like to attend a movie, and she got all defensive because she had some boyfriend who got jealous of her male friends. This same boyfriend has recently been shot and relinquished to ex status.
We started hanging out again months ago and she’s paid for one meal at Applebees. I’ve paid for every external activity ever since. Ok, she lives by herself, I live with my mother (saving up to move but people recommend I stay and finish my Master’s, that’s another story). She’s got more bills. Fine, we also sometimes sit at her house and drink those Smirnoff cooler things and watch T.V, but she doesn’t call for this either. I’ve discussed this with her, and she says it’s not something she does on purpose. But she still does it, so, even though I just hung out with her Friday (I didn’t want to go home) I must resort to pride and not call her anymore.
There is also my ex, [Penelope] who was my best friend since the 4th grade or some such nonsense. An elementary school teacher who is quite the tranquil, thoughtful person. Note: do not confuse thoughtful with considerate. Not in my estimation at least.
After A Series of Unfortunate Events which include a miscarriage, an abortion, arguments over tardiness and things of the past, we’ve (I’ve) decided to be friends (although we still engaged in intimate matters). This worked for sometime, until she disappeared for weeks and I had to yell at her on the phone to get the confession that she was seeing a guy who lived across the street from me and whose mother spoke to my mother. They dated for a little while, and then he admitted to Penelope that she was not his main dish, just the appetizer. That was months ago, and we started hanging again for a little while, but lately she also has stopped picking me up from work or asking to hang after offers of paying for dinner at Red Lobster or Friendly’s has stopped. So I must cut her off as well. This is not the only time she’s done this.
I almost always see bloggers post about loneliness. And that sharp sting of social despair has stuck me at times as well, but I didn’t want to give it the sad picture that others have. Company is unnecessarily costing me money, so the hermitage must be, until I come across someone else.
However, I did not mention the personal matters that they, and two other women I know, are going through, because that warrants a post within itself, which I shall write next. Oddly, they all have different spins on the same plight. Let us examine……….